Naked

Don't get it twisted...this won't be a blog post about nudity, but I am sure by now, I have probably caught your attention. When we think about being naked, many of us probably think about not wearing any clothes. Sure. But, when I think about being naked (emotionally), I also think about the vulnerability that comes along with being fully exposed. Deep down, most of us desire to be fully known. To be fully exposed while being accepted for who we are. This is the primary defintion of naked this blog will encompass. We will explore and prayerfully discover our own fig leaves - those things we do or say to cover up who we really are. Those masks we wear day in and day out.

My boyfriend...always holding me down!

Genesis 3:7

"At that moment, their eyes were opened,
 and they suddenly felt shame at their 
nakedness. So they sewed fig leaves 
together to cover themselves"

Many of us, myself included, have parts of us that we try to hide. Those parts we struggle to accept about ourselves that we think will be unacceptable to others, too. We try to fit into this cookie cutter mold of who society says we should be. We put ourselves in a box and stamp out the goodness and creativity God created us with. Maybe its a hobby we feel insecure about. Maybe it's a gift that the Lord has given us that we are fearful of walking in. Maybe it's a personality trait we try to mask so we won't be rejected. In some way, many, if not all of us, have our own fig leaves like Adam and Eve did in the garden. Not only did they sew fig leaves together to cover themselves after they felt exposed, but scripture reveals that they ran and hid from God.

My sweet, dear Carla! She's seen me at some
ofmy worst moments and
 some of my best :)

Sound familiar? It does to me. I have had many moments of falling short and wanting to run and hide from God. But each time, God gently reminds me who I am and draws me back to Him. He wants us to live a life where we can be fully naked around Him. To be fully exposed and let down our guards. He wants us to bring our hearts to Him...the good, the bad and the ugly. And not only does He ask us to be vulnerable with Him, but to be vulnerable with others. Of course, I always encourage people to use wisdom in whom they choose to share parts of themselves with, but when you find a few people you can trust it can be freeing. There is something scary about being vulnerable and giving others access to parts of our lives. What are they going to think? Will I be judged? Will they reject me and stop being my friend? This is probably a familiar narrative for many. 

James 5:16

"Confess your sins to each other and
pray for each other that you
 may be healed"

Liv and I in chi-town!

This past summer, a group of friends and I took a trip to Chicago for the legacy conference. During the trip, my friend (pictured above) and I took a walk throughout down-town chicago. We explored, bought some fancy popcorn and talked. And I mean, we talked. There were burdens on my heart and I decided to be vulnerbale. I deciced to expose these parts of my heart and it turned out to be that we had a lot more in common than we thought. I felt so refreshed after our conversation. It served as such a sweet reminder from the Lord that I wasn't alone and that He saw me...He saw her...He saw us. It was such a valuable moment that I immediately jotted it down in my journal. Our decision to be vulnerable and extend trust opened up the door for God to encourage us and speak to our hearts. Being vulnerable was worth the risk!

My girls...some of my best gals!

This past fall, my two bestfriends suprised me with a birthday trip to Atlanta. They had an entire weekend of fun and relaxation planned. On Saturday, we went to a Korean Sauna/Spa and stayed there for several hours. Upon arrival, we weren't quite sure what we were getting into. The spa was incredible. It was full of saunas, massage therapy, foot scrubs and even a sleeping room. It is open 24 hours a day. Then, there was a bathhouse section that we ended up calling, "the nude room". The bathhouse was full of jacuzzis, exfoliants, an intense steam room and an additional sauna. The only catch was....the bathhouse required you to be naked. They gave you these little towels that couldn't fully wrap around your body. We were completely exposed. At first, it felt a bit uncomfortable, but eventually I think we forgot we were naked. Anyways, I overheard a conversation two women were having. They were talking about how enouraging it felt to be in an environment full of women who were different weights, sizes and shapes. And how true that was. There was no judgement. It reminded me of the garden before the fall. Before sin entered the world. It reminded me of a time (biblically)  when Adam and Eve were naked and unashamed. Before they had to sew fig leaves together to cover up their shame. 

To be naked (emotionally) requires risk and vulnerability. Many people reading this may be thinking, "I have been hurt too many times to let down my guard." I get that and often face the same battle. Some folks at times have responded to me in a way that makes me feel like I could not share certain parts of my heart with them again. I know how hard it can be to be vulnerable, but it is worth the risk! My hope is that in this new year, we can learn to be vulnerable with God and with others. Cheers to 2019!

My cousins...my A1's !